Challenge no.11 Holly the Housewife

Live as a retro housewife for the day.

Set by fellow journalism student, Kayleigh AKA Biffa.

Me and Kayleigh met at the beginning of our course, we bonded over a love of shoes, all things tacky and a hatred of Camborne. Oh and most importantly, a love of Grease 2. Yes you heard me, Grease T-W-O! Not one, TWO! Kayleigh likes to cut her vegetables into 1cm cubes before freezing them and organising folders so they are colour coded and cross referenced, okay I am lying (a little bit), but she really does like shopping, shoes, holidays and drinking and is currently a vegan for her blog, http://www.flutterbypink.blogspot.com/.

Kayleigh set me this challenge as she knows I love the fifties but also knows I hate cleaning and general organisation.

As I didn't know exactly what being a good housewife required I scoured the internet for tips, this is what I found, it's hilarious http://j-walk.com/other/goodwife/images/goodwifeguide.gif.

Some points from the good wife's guide were to make sure you look good for your husband, earlier on in this blog you will have learnt I take alot of pride in my appearance so this was easy. Other suggestions were not so easy to swallow. Such as knowing my place, my husband is more important than me, do not question him. Yeah right.

Sometimes I love the idea of being a housewife, you are basically getting paid to make sure your home is a nice place to live and making sure your loved ones feel safe, happy and relaxed. However the same reasons do not appeal to me. How boring to be stuck at home all day and then have a husband to tired or stressed to take you out. Boooo.

I knew that I should wake before my 'husband' but this did not happen. I rose from my slumber at about 12, luckily Puffin was still asleep which meant I was able to make him breakfast in bed. We didn't have any breakfast foods such as eggs or bacon or bread so he had to have cereal, but I did put the sugar in a special little pot. Regardless of the effort I made, I knew a really good housewife would have made preparations the night before and woken up at 6am.

Then there was the washing-up to be done. Back in Essex we have a dishwasher, down here I have a dishwasher - My gorgeous boyfriend. Normally I do all the cooking and Puffin does all the washing-up. I am not used to this heathen lifestyle of washing dishes by hand. It's animalistic. Being the good housewife I am I did it without complaining, Puffin scrutinised my efforts and re-washed a frying pan. Perfectionist.

I made the bed (something I never usually do) and then Puffin and I went to the supermarket to pick up stuff for the evenings dinner. I knew dinner would be my time to shine. I have no issues telling you my cooking rules, hence why I do all the cooking. This is not me being big-headed, it's a fact, I make all my food from scratch. Even if you want chicken nuggets and chips for dinner, I will set about peeling potatoes and grating breadcrumbs. It sounds like alot of effort, but it is so worth it, people are always happy after eating food I have made them. When it comes to cooking I do have very old-fashioned principles.

My 'husband' told me he wanted a roast, so a roast we had. It was a success (as always), however after the huge roast dinner we had, my housewife routine started going rapidly downhill. While I was bidding on a dress on ebay, (it was vintage, I didn't win) Puffin was doing the washing-up, then I asked him to get me a beer. Oh dear. Somehow we had reversed roles, but I did not want to stop this flow, it felt so natural! We watched a DVD and then went to bed, I did not bother to do a last quick round of tidying or rub my husbands feet. I had had enough. If I'm honest I'd had enough of pretending to be a non-complaining, obedient housewife at about 2 hours after I woke up.

So I failed the challenge, but I did realise how much my boyfriend does for me around the house, so maybe from now on I will make the bed and help with the washing-up. I also have realised that I do love looking after Puffin, but I don't want to be his servant.

Holly's housewife tips:

1. Spray furniture polish, it makes the place smell clean, without actually cleaning!

2. Just shove all the mess into a wardrobe, you can always sort it out tomorrow

3. Pretend to have injured your back whilst hoovering or something, then get a massage, after all if he doesn't help you overcome your injury how will you be able to do anything else.

4. Be a tiger in the bedroom, three times a day should do it, he then really won't care how clean the house is.

Difficulty rating: Harder than you realise

Fun Factor: I enjoyed ensuring I looked good for my lover

Do this if..... you want to show your other half how much you appreciate them

Challenge 11: Failed!

Holly

x

Here is my way of making a basic yet awesome roast dinner.

You will need:

1 chicken
potatoes

broccoli
cauliflower

carrots

gravy granules

butter
oil

mixed herbs

salt and pepper

1. Pre-heat the oven to 190 oc. Butter the chicken, yes really, as though you are buttering a slice of bread, make sure you get enough butter out, you cannot put the knife back into the butter once it has touched the chicken. Sprinkle generously with mixed herbs, salt and pepper, put in oven (usually about 1 hour 30 minutes).

2. peel potatoes, make sure you serrate the edges, if you want you can par-boil them, sprinkle with salt, pepper and mixed herbs. Cover a baking tray in oil, put in the oven, make sure the oil is spitting hot before you put the potatoes on it. The serrating of egdes and hot oil helps to crisp the potatoes. Roast the potatoes for anything from 40 minutes to 1 hour.

3. Peel carrots, cut broccoli and cauliflower, salt some boiling water, simmer for 10 minutes or longer depending on how firm you want your vegetables.

3. Use the water from the vegetables to make the gravy.

4. Serve and enjoy

Me and Puffin also had yorkshire puddings, roast parsnip and sweet potatoes.